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行為過失，如何恰當(dāng)?shù)狼改?
We've all done things we need to apologise for, but eating humble pie is a skill in itself. This film will show you how to apologise properly and appropriately.
我們都曾經(jīng)做過需要道歉的事情，但是屈尊本身也是一種技巧。這段視頻將教給你怎樣恰到好處地道歉。
Step 1: Prepare
1.準(zhǔn)備
Take time to consider your apology. What exactly are you apologising for? What effect did your actions have on the other person? How can you make amends for what you've done?
花費(fèi)一點(diǎn)時(shí)間來考慮一下怎樣道歉。你具體因?yàn)槭裁炊狼?你的行為對別人帶來了哪些影響?你為自己的所作所為可以進(jìn)行哪些補(bǔ)償?
Step 2: Approach
2.方法
Depending on the gravity of the situation, it's often a good idea to apologise one-on-one, rather than in a group setting. Choose a quiet moment to make your approach. Ask if you can have a word with the person, and take them to one side.
取決于形勢的嚴(yán)重程度，通常面對面單獨(dú)道歉比較好，而不是面對一大群人。選擇一個(gè)安靜的時(shí)刻來到這個(gè)人面前，問對方可否說一句話，然后把他們帶到一邊。
Step 3: Lower your tone of voice
3.緩和語氣
You should not be looking for an argument. Remain non-confrontational by lowering your tone of voice. Speak clearly, but gently.
你來不是為了爭吵。語氣要緩和，不要針鋒相對。說話要清晰，但是要溫和。
Avoid raised, dominant-sounding tones as these will make you seem aggressive.
不要高聲占優(yōu)勢地說話，因?yàn)檫@樣會讓你看上去咄咄逼人。
Step 4: Eye contact
4.眼神交流
It is important that the person you are apologising to knows that you are sincere. Make plenty of eye contact, particularly when you are making important points.
必須讓道歉對象知道你是真誠的，這非常重要。進(jìn)行足夠的眼神交流，尤其是當(dāng)你提到重點(diǎn)的時(shí)候。
If you look away at the key moments, or refuse to meet their gaze at all, they may think you are holding something back.
如果關(guān)鍵時(shí)刻眼神漂移不定，或者完全躲開對方的眼神，他們可能認(rèn)為你想要逃避。
Step 5: The apology
5.道歉
Don't beat around the bush. Get straight to the point, and be specific.
不要拐彎抹角，切中要害，直截了當(dāng)。
Make it clear that you understand the effect your actions had on the other person, and make an effort to empathise.
明確表示你能夠理解自己的行為對對方造成的影響，努力強(qiáng)調(diào)。
If necessary, be prepared to make amends for your actions. If you don't know how to do this, ask them.
如果必要的話，準(zhǔn)備好為自己的行為作出補(bǔ)償。如果你不知道應(yīng)該怎樣做，直接問他們。
Step 6: Take the wrap
6.附和
The other person may still be angry with you, and in order to clear the air they might need to communicate this.
對方可能仍然很生氣，為了消除誤會，他們可能需要進(jìn)行溝通。
If so, you need to face the music. Let them express their anger, and don't fight back. This will make things worse.
如果這樣的話，你要勇于承擔(dān)責(zé)任。讓他們表達(dá)自己的不滿，不要反擊，這只會讓形勢更加糟糕。
Step 7: Finish on a positive
7.樂觀
Close the conversation by looking to the future.
通過展望未來結(jié)束對話。
Finish with a handshake, a hug, or whatever seems appropriate. Then walk away.
握手，擁抱或以任何恰當(dāng)?shù)姆绞浇Y(jié)束對話，然后走開。
Don't let the conversation linger as this could provide an opportunity for old wounds to resurface.
不要讓對話進(jìn)行太長時(shí)間，否則只會讓舊傷有機(jī)會重新復(fù)發(fā)。
Move on cleanly, and accept that you have been forgiven.
干脆利落地走開，接受你已經(jīng)被原諒的事實(shí)。
In more serious circumstances it may be appropriate to write a note. This should always be handwritten on quality paper, and addressed to the person you are apologising to. It must be a considered, individual apology, demonstrating a personal effort on your part. Again, you should be specific about what you are apologising for, and show that you understand the consequences of your actions.
在更嚴(yán)重的情況下，寫一張便條也是恰當(dāng)?shù)�。一定是用高質(zhì)量的紙張來手寫，標(biāo)明你想要道歉的人的地址。作為個(gè)人道歉，你必須親自做出努力。而且必須明確表示自己為什么而道歉，表明你理解自己的行為造成的后果。
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